people ask me y i lock my blog,
e reason is..., i just lock it,
for me to think some stuffs & reflect! plus im really busy n has no time to update.

anw, have little jamming time with patrina in e studio on tue,(actually i didnt play much at all), just amazed by her, hahax, cos she play e piano so well!
n she teach me so blue style of music!
which is dam cool n nice!!!!

after that went to string practice tgt with sam n grace.
its like so long since e last time we actually went for e practice lol
but we didnt have lesson with e teacher, and we practice forbidden love instead of e classical songs in e bk.
after that we jam and play with grace playing e piano while sam n i play e violin of forbidden love.
and we r so motivated to practice n play violin lol, hahahx!
we also jam some blue n jazz tgt that pat has just taught me,
in e end, pat learn abit from reuben, while grace too, and i learn it from pat,
so in e end e master teacher of all, is reuben lol. hahax
but its so fun being able to play tgt and play! :)

wed
didnt go sch for my only class on wed cos i have bad bad diarrhoea!
started from 5+, 2nd time at 7am+ n e 3rd time at 10+ lol!
its so horrible! e pain just nonstop n keep coming thaty i didnt go sch in e morning.
after that was finally better after taking e medicine,
so went to sch to help out in e talentime,
cos im 1 of e judges.
there are some that who r really gd, while some really nervous, and 1 really nonsense lol!
n pat! e most entertaining one!
hahahx, come in to chat chat with e judges one, and just play her remt song lol, hahahx

thur
feel like totally waste time going to sch,
other then i finally present finish my music theory,
n didnt do anything during dvpt too, cos we all haven start filming yet, (DIE! when e deadline is just 1 weeks time!) so we just watch some show, cant rem e name, lol


anw, some things i wan to say to my friends,
when i didnt talk much, that doesnt mean im unhappy, angry or wat happen,
it can simply just mean that i m tired,or i just don feel like talking, no mood to get high, but im not emo, n i never wan to attract attention, cos all i wan is to be alone, so u all can just don bother me, its ok.
and there r just too much things in my mind,
that i need to think,
it doesnt mean must be smt related to u guys, but i didnt show n say out anything cos i don wan to bother n affect all of u, cos i just need to think myself, and smt its really tiring n hard to put on a smile all e time to hide all ur sadness behind.
but don bother asking me y or wat happen,
cos if u noe me well, if i choose not to say, it means no, i won say,
n i can just solve or recover by myself, cos CHUNHUI is strong n INDEPENDENT gal!
n if i really need to say, i will say it out myself, n get u all to be my listener,
so don worry abt me.

i feel that i have changed, in some thinking and e way i c things,
even more mature now, more deep and understand more n more things as i went through all e things each n everyday.

but to some ppl, i dono if that is gd or bad to u,
that u say chunhui change,
that is cos u don really noe me,
i can say, it can be hard,
unless u can put urself in other people's shoe and think.

chunhui is a listener and thinker,
but not a person who easily express her deep deep down inside feelings or things to anyone easily,
unless u r really really very close to her, or she really cant handle herself n extreme that she just need u to listen to her, n be her side, that's all.

but chunhui strongly belive in herself,
that she will be more n more independent n mature each day, will treasure and enjoy, fill her everyday to e fullest! :)


but i wan to thank xxx for e calls,
didnt expect at all,
although we r not very close n u dont no much of my stuffs,
but thanks for all e jokes n all,
its nice talking to u, cos that is when i don have any pressure and can leave away all e unhappy things, and forget abt them, and cheer up to be happy again ;)

lots of things r like finally over now!
finally finish bums, MUST, but haven present yet, and performance 2day.

didnt slp much for e whole wk esp wed& thur.
went to sam's house aro 11+ (last min decision) to rush our MUST presentation tgt,
n i finish at 5am, only manage to slp awhile till 6+ where we left sam house to sch.
and for total, we have 100 slides!
OHMAN, that is like super alot, thaty we only manage to present sam's part on thur.


didnt slp e whole of thur nit, NOT AT ALL, not even 5mins of nap! to rush BUMS assig!
only slp for an hr after i reach hm at 6+ or 7pm lol.
how amazing lol!
i cant even belive myself too!
but i guess is e tea n coffee milk that keeps my awake, but e brain was dead aro 4 or 5am + too. so could not concentrate n think too, so i just rush n rush to finish, missing lots of points to add in, but just hope that its not that bad still.
after printed my work, bath again n rush to sch in cab again! cos is jimmy class, but i was so tired that half way i really cant take it anymore that i can just fall alsp any time lol.
n after e lesson end, i went to e toilet, was shock to c myself in e mirror, my eyes were so swollen, face so pale, and looks dam horrible can lol!
during lunch, my cousin n his friends saw me in sch, they were like telling me, this is how tired an person look like when she never slp e whole nit lol! (cos on thur nit, they were in my house, rushing their presentation tgt with my cousin, and didnt slp at all too)

but i slp during my gems class lol, sry, i couldnt help it.hahahx.
n have recording till 10pm in sch.

(n thank u for accompany me e whole nit, n helping, really thanks alot, i think i will just die without ur help!)

sat was fun, sam, grace, peiyun, joel n vick came to my house to stay over, cos we wan to rehearse our performance 2day tgt with e yangqin.
but it feels more like a stay over, for fun instead for e performance practice, cos we r like so relax n just enjoy ourself lol.
we have mac dinner,
we have a muffin for sam to surprise her, hahax, but without a candle, so vick has to use a lighter to pretend to let her blow it. hahahx
we have a little drink, n this grace was drunk! lol,
after that have movie marathon, watch "red water" first, after that dono wat show, so ....., nvm, shall not mention here, thanks to grace lol! ahhaahx, and watch saw in e late nit till 5am end n slp.

grace, sam n peiyun share my queen size bed, vick n joel share a super single bed, n i slp on a singer size tatamin, but i will never going to slp on that again next time! its so so super super hard! make my whole body aching! bone so pain! sld have just slp on e sofa instead lol!

but i like e stayover, its fun with all u guys! (:

shall upload e pic after i get from joel (:

so off to bed now, nitz

THANK YOU everyone who wish me! :)

have been very busy and tired this few days, lots of things happened, and kinna affected me, e way i c birthday, and makes me feel very sad, disappointed and this also remind me of wat Nut told me last yr, that its just a bday, still got many yrs to go lol!
this is like the first time im not excited for my bday to come, and cried many times be4 e day come and on e day itself :(
cos im hurt by U! tanu! so hurt!
my wish for u all was so simple, just a meal tgt, so easy to be done, but yet, this is how u treated me! n since that day, not even a single msg, or call n even till 2day,where my bday has alr over, i hear ngt from u. its so disappointing, this is how u always say best friend shld be?
im disappointed at myself too, realised how lousy friend im.

i fall alsp beside my laptop on fri nite, cos im really really tired, so im sry to those ppl who talked to me, so sry abt it.
i slp till late afternoon on sat, supposed to meet WS at nit for dinner since he is e 1st to ask me long go, but i received late msg from my youngest aunt, asking me to go her house to have dinner 2nit, with my uncle and little cousins, so i have no choice to go,n cancel e dinner with WS, i feel very bad of last min cancel, really, and after i received ur 1st reply after i told u, i feel so so bad and my tears just came down my cheek, i feel dam bad, and suddenly i feel that i have treat u as a friend for granted :( but after receiving ur next msg, and apologized to u, i feel much better alr. (Im really sry!)

so i went to my aunt house alone at nit, (met my bro be4 i leave and i thought he was going tgt too, but his reply was "no", and i asked y not going? his replied was "cos im tired!"LOL!
u r e one who tell me abt going to aunt house in e nit, cos my little cousins wan to celebrate my bday tgt, but now ur reason for not going is just cos u r tired. LOL!
so much things happened and my mood was alr down and now he throw me with this, i feel so sad, i tried to control my tears in e cab, but e tears just couldnt obey me. i always thought that no matter what happen, he will always be e one there for me, and really someone i can depend on too, but that just hurt me.
really i reached my aunt's house, she asked me abt him, but i just say,i dono, he just say no when i asked him if he is coming or not.
i tried to control my emotions infront of all of them, esp my little cousins, cos they r so happy to c me, and to them, bday suppose to be e happiest day cos they got to receive presents!
how i wish i can just be like them lolx!
we just have a simple meal, my aunties and uncle just simply talking among themselves, and my littles cousins addicted on watching their show on tv, so i was like alone, but still trying to puts on a smile infront of them.
thus this is like e first time i say yes when my uncle asked me if i wan to drink or not, i drank a cup of ice-wine, cos my mood was really down, so im hoping that i can just get drank and forget abt all these unhappiness.
so after opening e wine, we cut e cake. this is like e only time when everyone finally gets e attention to me while singing e bday song to me.
but at e pt of time, i couldnt even think of any wishes so i just blow my candle away then :(

after that, eveyone is back to wat i have just mentioned eariler, and we left my aunt house aro 11+ then.
reached home be4 12, and received msg from ferz, and soon he appeared downstairs of my house with my present.
he pass me e snoopy, and its like finally i can took it from him, after like 6months? where it suppose to be my christmas present lol!
anw, but i was having a little headach, most probably of e wine, so my mood wasnt high, and excited at all. (im really sry, i noe it mean to be a surprise for me, alth i alr expected u will do this, but im sry still for e reaction i gave and response. )
but im really thankful for wat u have done, and thanks for e gifts, i really like it alot! :)

and smt happened in e morning that really surprised me!
i was still slping but e next moment i was awake by my dear friends, sam, grace, peiyun, peilin, joel& vick!,singing happy bday song to me in my room!
OMG! im really shocked! cos im still slping and when i wakeup to c them all in my room and with e cake in their hand, im really really shocked! lolx!
i didnt even noe they came! cos grace gang up with my cousins with this! lol! hahax!
but really thank u thank u all 4e lovely surprised!
im really touched by all u guys,and thanks 4e coming still when i noe that some of u have things on after that.
this is really going to be so memorable that i will never forget! thank u all! really! u all have really brigten my day! THANK U! I LOVE U LOTS LOTS!

its not wat kind of presents u get, is e thoughts and hearts that counts which r e most important! and who can u spend it with!
im really glad that i have met such lovely friends in poly, n they really those ppl that i really care & treasure alot!
THANK U ALL AGAIN!

those ppl that wish me (sms) after 12midnit

peilin (exactly on e dot!)
ferz
patrina (but she did wish me eariler be4 12 alr, but wish me another time again!heex)
joel
kangli
grace
samantha
peiyun (prue)
WS
Shaojie
Berlyn
cynthia
joyce song
tracy song
my aunt
khas
Vanessa goh
CJ
Timothy
Shun
Dhanish
Camila
Ginny
Arthur
Denise
Barnet
TC (by call)
Michelle
Shiyun
enming on msn,(but he did wish be4 it comes)
dehui (on msn)
jet (on msn)

but i met afew of them at esplanda and they wish me again when they c me,
like pat, jeremy and yq. thank u :)

and many of them wish me through blog here and friendster,
like samantha (apex), meiqi, fq, bro's friends, alpha, shiyun, camila, kellyn, adelin,
samantha wong, sheri, enqi
thank u all :)

here are those belated one
ericson
nut (by call e next day after my bday, super surprised, but he claim that he took his precious time to make a call for me lol! so which make him talk to SAMAN 2 min less lol, hahax, but thanks still :)
darren
sheryl& xanthus
and many others who happen to c me in sch.
and my michele meiling, so happen to met her at mrt!
thank u all too! :)

ohya, i must to say a big thank u to all e main comm ppl in SPSE too, thank u all for e surprise cake for both camila and i after e interview for yr 1s!
thank u! :)

next up coming, will be our dear sam and peilin's bday!
hahax! finally to their 18 ys old! :)

i overslpt 2day till 10am, when my class start at 10am! so end up didnt even go sch 2day.
so went to Sim Lim square with my bro to get a new headphone, and it cost me $250++ lol!
didnt thought of buying such exp one, but thanks to my bro, go tell e person that e budget is aro $200+ -, so wat i plan to buy be4 that, (e one i used to have be4 it spoil) e person comment that it wasnt gd enough, lol, so end up buying this AKG brand headphone.
Hope it really gd and can use it for long term.

after that met sam& grace at library to research for our MUST assig.
there are lots of things to research and read and we have to done it be4 this coming mon too.

so i guess that my weekend will be filled with assigs and my bday be companied by assigs again!
that's how sad ):
but i feel even disappointed and sad was e msg i received from my sec friend 2day.
i just asked if we could meet up on sat instead of sun, cos i think my sun will most probably have to finish MUST grp presentation and do BUMS assigs too. but e reply i get from her was so.... )':
she said she cant cos she has other plan with other ppl alr, and cant just anyhow change like that, and if i don wan to meet then just forget abt it. her tone was so bad and replied all those things when i only just ask her if is possible for us to meet up on sat instead of sun, be4 i even say anything else,lol.
does she even rem that my bday is coming?lol
i didnt want or wished to get anything or asked them to get my anything 4my bday, all i wan is just a time that e few of us and meet up tgt, and simply just have a meal and chat, that's gd enough alr, since its like so long we last met.

but i feel so sad, and neither excited for my bday to come too.
cos i don wan to be filled with doing assig and more assigs,(but no choice)
and my parents wasnt here with me,
i cant be with those people i wan to be with,
its like meeting up for just a meal, is that so hard?
those people u care n treasure alot, don really care n take u to heart,
then wat is e pt of celebrating?
and im just not excited as compare to all my dear friends now, who r finally turning 18 this yr.
wat so big deal of bday, my 18 bday has just pass like that, n wat so special abt 19 soon.

maybe i just failed to be a nice friend and not important at all...

lots of things happen and im just so busy to update.

july is a busy month!
n BIRTHDAY month!
so many ppl birthday is in JULY!
my pocket has big big holes alr, on buying all e birthday gifts!
but its ok, cos its once in a yr! and many of them r finally turning 18!

so we celebrate vick's bday, late june, and denise 18 birthday!
shall update e details e other time,
for denise. u can proceed to her blog,
but sadly that we didnt manage to take any pic with vick on his bday!


other then those bday celebrations,
everyday is doing assigs and more assigs, ):
i still have
2 midi ex, going to be 3 on mon,
REMT recordings,
BUM 3000 essays, which i haven even start and think of wat i wan to do,
MUST presentation, 45 min,
performance practice,
DVPT,
and all this are due so soon! ):

and i have a horrible weekend staying at home, trying to rest, cos i vomit 3 times, dirrohoea 3times too for e whole sat, + crams! lol, all come to tgt that i feel like dying alr LOL!
so im sry to sam n grace that i didnt meet them at e library on sat, and ferz for giving me&sam e tickets for NDP, but couldnt go in e end ):

2day went to 1 of e dmat senior,siewting, house to borrow her yangqin for our coming performance, thanks to sam and her parents, for fetching me and helping me to transport all e way from kovan to my house. Thanks! (: but we still have to think of a way on how to transport to esplande on e actual day! i think we will need a van! hahax